Things to do on your smartphone when you're on a train by a field somewhere north of Worcester waiting behind a train that may or may not be stuck on some points that almost certainly aren't working even if the men in orange jackets go and frown at them:
- Check your e-mails
- Check your blog stats
- Look at the time that the train time app predicts that you'll get to Bristol
- Try to work out a new connection for your colleague
- Check your e-mails
- Work out what time the loud woman on the phone opposite will get to her station
- Check your blog stats
- Download a sudoku game
- Mutter about how the sudoku game doesn't work how you wish it did
- Force your colleague to help you with the sudoku game when you realise that you haven't played sudoku in three years and have completely lost the knack
- Find the button that makes the sudoku game work the way you wish it did
- Check your e-mails
- Show your colleague your blog stats
- Speculate why people would have been googling "what is a shape of a tortoise" or "I found my finger reaching" in the first place
- Wonder how someone from South Korea ended up reading your blog
- Find the location of the train on a map
- Search for knitting shops nearby
- Consider planning a trip to Worcester to visit a knitting shop that you nothing about except for that the fact that it is fairly near to the train line
- Check your e-mails
- Check your train times
Under no circumstances dwell on the fact that the stuck train has now robbed you of one of the eleven hours that you will be both awake and at home this week.
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